Silence of Older Mothers in 2012 and 2025

 

 (The picture is of the conifers at the National Park near our house in Oklahoma - they remind me of the trees at the California mountain home where we passed most of our homeschooling years)

So, the post that came up in the randomizer this time was The Silence of Older Homeschooling Moms.    A perennial topic, no doubt, and Melissa Wiley's post starting the reflection is still there.  

The TL:DR version of my post:

------------

1.   Older moms go silent because they are transitioning into a different role -- less director, more witness and support.

2. There are ways you can continue the conversation even as an older mom.

------------

The post is from June 2012, which was before social media had really exploded.   And it seems to me that venues like Facebook became very useful to older moms because they could gather in groups where they could share difficulties with other veterans without scaring the new moms, and also, the format lends itself more to the present moment and less to permanence.   And that can work when you don't want to crystallize a passing thought or mood or season for all time.  

So it seems to me that Facebook became the way to continue the conversation.    

----------

Another thought, going in a completely different direction:

Silence is not a mere negative.   For instance --   very little is said about the life of the Holy Family in Scripture.    This time of year, when we have just celebrated the Nativity, the Epiphany and then the Baptism of our Lord and His first miracle at Cana, we can't help being deeply aware of a kind of vigorous, deeply important silence and hiddenness.   So little is said about that thirty years of the Incarnation -- almost 90% of the whole -- and yet, how much is in that silence!   

Mary treasured these things and pondered them in her heart, and that takes silence.   If we modelled nothing else as older moms it would be worthwhile to practice this treasuring in the heart, this attention to eternal things.   Not just as an example, but also as a way of deepening the significance of ordinary life, of being there for the younger moms in the middle of everything.   

I think about how much my mother was part of my life and still is even though she is no longer living on earth.    She didn't have to say much.   She was and is a witness in both senses -- attentive to our lives, and a heritage and continuing legacy as well.   The homeschooling moms that preceded me smoothed my path even by  their mistakes and oversights, but especially by their courage and creativity.     And that continued even when they weren't talking much publicly.   

-------------------------

That's about all the meta I can do right now, though if you read this and have related thoughts, or want to say hello, please do comment!  And Chari and I are still working out the practical implications, especially as it relates to blogging.   Any thoughts on that are welcome too.